8 O'clock Tick Tock

Fox Orders Pilot Starring Barenaked Ladies
When Barenaked Ladies Attack likely to be disappointment for first time viewers.

Floridians Still in Shelters After Jeanne
Still working their way through hot-dishes left over from Labor Day picnics.

Researchers Digest Data From Calif. Quake
"You fools! Don't EAT it!"

Scientists Find Mount St. Helens Movement
"JESUS! What? Did a cow shit in here?"

Those Who Dodge Jury Duty Face Shaming
From Legend of Zelda novel by John Grisham.

Australia, India should jointly patrol Indian Ocean: think tank
Think ship.

Woods Unsure About Tee Time With Injury
Wrist injury: unable to look at watch

Older People Turn to Internet to Find Love
Send annoying chain emails.