The Falling Behind Nine

1. U.N. Pick Called Bully Who Abused His Power
Ended Up Getting Appointed by Him to Be Representative to UN

2. It's the Wilderness Years for Militias
And until the cost of metropolitan shacks go down, it's likely to stay that way.

3. California's history of highway innovation
Began with routing of cloverleaf around cement-plated rabbit hole

4. U.S. Indicts 3 Suspected Terrorist Scouts
The Statesman develops true Washington connections

5. Budget plan is in the chips
Also floating in the beer and broadcast at the end of "The Simple Life." US Dept of Revenue Attempting New Method of Educating Public on Where Tax Dollars Go

6. Japan Approves Drilling in Disputed Sea
Plan to access area via Bickering Straight with boats built on nearby Hosst Isle

7. Ratzinger Said Gaining Papal Elector Favor
Surpassing Ratzenberger, who apparently lied extensively on his resume

8. Deadly Flu Strain Shipped Worldwide
Thanks a lot, Brown

9. Jackson aide promised rewards, says boy's stepdad
Signed him up for Capital One card