Nine at nine.

1.
Bush, Kerry to Visit Critical Iowa Today
Expect to hear 'You Suck!' pretty much wherever they go.
2.
Storms Flood Tenn. Just As Tornados Leave
Scheduling conflicts make it tough to get these two 'forces of nature' together.
3.
Whirlpool Reduces Its Earnings Forecast
Can only mean good things for Scylla.
4.
A-Rod Called Out in Strange Running Play
$25M a year and he runs like a girl.
5.
Scientists Call for Cod Fishing Ban, Industry Angry
And you won't like them when they're angry.
6.
South Korea to Pick Country's First 2 Astronauts
At random.
7.
Overweight People Struggle to Exercise
Overweight people everywhere stunned.
8.
'Sizzler' Inspections Sought; 1 Man Killed
'Twizzler' inspections reveal strawberry goodness.
9.
Coast Guard Hobbled by Work, Deterioration
Would be far more effective without work.