Eight.....ayyyyyy ate.

1.
Charges Dropped Against Playground Shooter
The principal charge was ball-hogging.
2.
Woman Pleads Guilty in Human Smuggling
Smuggled small child for nine months.
3.
Mexico's Ex-Ruling Party Wins Two Races
100m and 200m
4.
Polanski Asks UK Lords to Let Him to Sue from Afar
Their body odor is unbelievable.
5.
Powell Vows to Work Hard Until Departure
Has cleaned desk enough to make place for feet.
6.
Conservationists Meet to Plan Global Green Agenda
Cheney warns that meeting is likely target of al Qaeda.
7.
Study: Posture Able to Communicate Fear
Shaking, hand in mouth obvious clues.
8.
New Hope for Alzheimer's Patients
Everything is new for Alzheimer's patients.