Hang 10

1.
Gorbachev Gives Prize to Cat Stevens
Kept Crackerjacks for himself.
2.
Little Rock 'Meanest' Toward Homeless
Lucky not to be getting the Big Rock.
3.
Falwell Plans for 'Evangelical Revolution'
More and more Americans hoping for Armageddon just to shut these fuckers up.
4.
Airlines OK Drinking Water Tests, Flushing
Look out below!
5.
Dell to build factory in N.C., hire 1,500 workers
Future Dell desktops to come preloaded with Nascar stickers.
6.
Bush Wants Line-Item Veto to Be Revived
Urged to try the one he already has before commiting to a different one.
7.
Gov. Jeb Bush Not Eyeing Presidential Run
Fixing elections more exciting.
8.
T.rex Fancied Ribs, Scientist Says
Chilis rolls out new ad campaign featuring small armed scavenger with bibb and big grin.
9.
Report: Many Species Scramble to Adjust to Warming
Shortage of hats, sunblock at most Arctic convenience stores.
10.
Waist Size Linked to Future Heart Trouble -Studies
Size 29 at particular risk.