Five Talkin'

1. So, What's Not to Like About Amiable Advisor?
He keeps registering you for TCA classes.

2. Demobilized Fighters on Rise in Colombia
The so called, "Christopher Reeve Brigade" stirring fear in the hearts of Latin Americans.

3. Severe Thunderstorms Sweep Across Mich.
Leveling hospitals and factories in its southward course then, in a move defying any phenomenon known to meteorology, changes direction suddenly and wipes out band of rebels to the northeast before heading off into Lake Huron.

4. Wis. Girl Who Survived Rabies Turns 16
Eats cake and candles, then growls, yips, and flings mouth-froth at fellow party-goers.

5. Insects Post Hazard for Firefighters
Particularly if those insects are careless smokers.