Better late, ten never

1.
Police Still Using Matrix-Type Database
DMV still using matrix-type printer
2.
Many Florida Residents to Ride Out Dennis
REO Speedwagon blasting from stereo, until power cut, by irate neighbors.
3.
NAACP Chair Renews Attack on Conservatives
Changes height, back position at unexpected times.
4.
Unocal Sells Unit to Pogo for $1.8 Billion
Old comic strip bides its time waiting for the right moment to return to prominence.
5.
Ford Begins Selling Second Hybrid Vehicle
Owner to pick it up Saturday.
6.
Skateboarder Clears Great Wall of China
Redfines barbarian.
7.
Hip hop mogul Russell Simmons denies partnership with McDonald's
Quickly wipes special sauce from his mouth.
8.
Partners Worried As Microsoft Thinks Small
Microsoft just trying to make it last.
9.
Apache faces Web services security spec roadblock
Apache Chief has answer - 'enuk chuk'.
10.
Three States Eligible for Hurricane Aid
Inexplicably including Idaho.