Gee! Eight.

1.
Bush Thanks Denmark for Helping in Iraq
Every morning in the mess hall troops treated to danish.
2.
AOL Takes Streaming Video to Next Level
Now almost above ground.
3.
Gulf Coast Braces for Arrival of Cindy
Dirty whore aims to please.
4.
Investors to watch earnings, jobs
Their ass.
5.
Darfur's enemies agree on basics, adjourn talks
"I don't like you, you don't like me. Good day sir."
6.
Israel Commits Large Force for Pullout
Rams it back in just as hard.
7.
Rice to visit Asia, but skip ASEAN forum
Dr. Rice cannot tolerate misspellings, even in an acronym.
8.
Study: Slow Walking May Be Best for Obese
Fast walking often becomes rolling and then all hell breaks loose.