Evil TENevil

1. Panel Overrules Feds on New England Bases
In rare reversal of attitude, New England chooses to care.
2. Motorola Phones Let Parents Monitor Kids
Without actually having any real contact with them at all.
3. Mayor: Suspicious Truck Near Fenway Not Terror Related
Filled with hot dogs, the content of which IS suspicious.
4. Free Land in the Heartland Draws Newcomers
Circa 1862.
5. Utah Man Charged With Insurance Fraud
The plot of Fletch, starring Chevy Chase.
6. Scotland's "Braveheart" honored, 700 years on
By having his entrails returned.
7. Franks, Packers Agree to Long-Term Deal
You come in a bun, we eat you.
8. Playboy to hit Internet with digital edition
Previous analog website accessible to none.
9. AOL to reform customer service in Spitzer pact
In a related story, lifelong friends agree to never change, in spit pact.
10. Kucinich Gets Hitched to British Woman
Only socialized dentistry could create his equal.