BeaTen but still fighTen

1. Michael Jackson Called for Jury Service
Raising the question as to whom is on trial with Jackson as his 'peer'.
2. Your Brain Remembers What You Forget
Holding memories for ransom in an effort to reduce alcohol consumption.
3. Astrologer predicts own death
Raising questions of conflict of interest.
4. Wal-Mart Heiress Returns USC Diploma
Buys USC.
5. Law Enforcement Group Issues Taser Guide
Nerd group issues Laser Tag guide.
6. Parents: Our daughter was molested at Dolly Parton's Dixie Stampede
By a herd of cattle.
7. Bush Likely to Have More Praise for Abbas
Has Fernando on his Ipod.
8. U.N.: Darfur Fighting Hinders Aid
Kung Fu Fighting not much help either.
9. HP Pressures Blu-Ray on New DVD
Hall of Justice pressures Manta Ray on world domination.
10. Military: New Aluminum Windows Stop .50-Caliber Bullet
New x-ray glasses allow you to see through aluminum.