2010 A headline Odyssey

1.
Powell Pledges More Help in Tsunami Tour
Part of Beatles cover band.
2.
Army Drowning Trial to Begin at Fort Hood
First case of witchcraft in 300 years.
3.
Americans Donate Medical Books to Iraq
Thick tomes being strapped to the outside of humvees.
4.
Wall Street Set to Open Firmer
Wakes with one of those mysterious morning erections.
5.
Jack Straw to represent Britain at Jakarta summit
OK with flood disasters, fears fire.
6.
Tsunami Adds to Belief in Animals' 'Sixth Sense'
See dead people.
7.
Russia Plans Laws Against Polluting Industry in 05
Polluting Industry odd relic of former communist regime. As if they didn't have enough pollution without it.
8.
Quake May Have Made Earth Wobble--US Scientists
May have just been that old egg nog.
9.
Dual Pacemakers Worth the Cost, U.S. Study Finds
Dueling pacemakers of questionable value.
10.
Study: Diuretics a Net Plus for Elderly
Makes them pee though often uncontrollably.