6

1. Burmese monks 'to be sent away'
Thanks to Supreme Chancellor Charlie X

2. Zimbabwe 'running out of bread'
Burundi, sitting on a supply of 10 million empty buns, senses opportunity.

3. Security Alert Issued on Toys With Remotes at Airports
Robo-Sapien detained.

4. Fatal Airplane Crashes Drop 65%
Fly straight mountains, buildings, 35%

5. Yale Law, Newly Defeated, Allows Military Recruiters
If there's one thing that's going to turn around lagging enlistment numbers, it's sending recruiters to Yale.

6. Crackdowns on video game cheating gain currency
Mixdorf narrowly achieves statute of limitation for controversial 'Xenophobe' incident.