Headlines

All The News That's Fit to Mock

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Dusting off another ten

1. Autopsy: Boyzone singer died of natural causes
Shame, as a result of being in a band called Boyzone.
2.
FBI delves into DMV photos in search for fugitives
Amazed/alarmed at the general state of ugliness, discontent among drivers.
3. Arizona sweat lodge where 2 died lacked permit
Citizen of CF, Iowa previously unaware of sweating permit requirements, panics.
4. Romanian government falls in confidence vote
Citizens unconvinced present ruling party able to deal with vampire threat.
5. Baucus: 'Time to get the job done' on health care
Sick and tired of being the guy holding things up.
6. What is Olympia Snowe thinking?
"Do I look fat in this pantsuit?"
7. Southcarolina
South, unable to muster strength to even capitalize, resolves to rise later.
8. Are obese people less likely to commit suicide?
Simply too much effort to even bother.
9. Women's Empowerment: 'Men Are Interested'
Whatever it takes to get more head.
10. Robotic prostate surgery may mean big trade-off
Possible surgical complications versus coolness of robotic prostate.